Unfair Bride Disgusted When Her SIL Wore a White Blouse to Her Wedding. She Doesn’t Think She Did Anything Wrong

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“Don’t wear white” is an age-old wedding rule, but one that comes with exceptions.

For example, black-tie weddings require that men wear white dress shirts. Women might be able to get away with wearing a printed dress that has small accents of white rather than all-over solid color.

One woman was left baffled after her future sister-in-law, the bride, was livid over her outfit choice. Yes, the woman broke the bride’s “no white” dress code, but the situation isn’t all that it seems.

She took to the internet to ask if she was in the wrong for accidentally wearing white to the wedding.

This is how the story played out and what people had to say:

Background

Our white-wearing woman, or the original poster (OP), was invited to her brother’s wedding. The siblings get along okay but aren’t very close. They live far apart, so they don’t talk much.

Overall, OP describes her family as “really chill” and not dramatic.

Because OP does live a long distance from her brother, she flew in a week in advance of the wedding.

Is OP in the bridal party?

It isn’t uncommon for the bride and groom to include their future in-laws in their bridal party. However, this was not the case for OP.

“I was not in the bridal party or anything like that. I don’t really have a relationship with his wife. There should be no bad blood between anyone,” explained OP.

What was the wedding dress code?

The wedding invitation listed the dress code as “fancy.” It specified that guests should avoid indigo blue dresses and red velvet suits, as that was the attire of the bridal party. The invitation also stated that guests should not wear white dresses.

Beyond that, that invitation didn’t have any other dress code rules.

What did OP plan on wearing to the wedding?

A fancy dress code might suggest that women attending wear dresses. For OP, this wasn’t an option. “I hate dresses. I have not worn one since I was 13. For my own wedding, I wore a very nice white pantsuit,” said OP.

“For this occasion, I chose a normal black suit, vest, and suit jacket. White blouse, black heels, slick hair, and some toned-down makeup. No tie but a nice necklace.”

Was OP trying to upstage the bride?

This wouldn’t be the first time that a family member tried to create wedding drama with their unique look, but according to OP, that wasn’t her intention at all.

She said, “I looked good but in no way bridal or upstage-y. To be honest, most men had the same outfit on. Sans heels. It never crossed my mind that I was doing something wrong.”

What happened at the wedding?

OP wore her outfit as planned, and all was fine until the reception. After dinner ended, OP noticed that members of the bridal party were frequently bumping into her.

When OP had to take her vest off because it had a stain, the bridal party became more aggressive. They became hostile, and eventually, a bridesmaid purposely spilled red wine on her.

“I was mad, but I pretended like it was a genuine mistake and didn’t say anything,” described OP.

Did the bride or groom say anything?

Based on OP’s details, the bride and groom didn’t say anything to her during the wedding about what happened. It was after the wedding when OP finally heard from her brother.

“My brother has called me three times. Once to tell me that I really (messed) up his wedding. The second time to demand that I apologize. The third time, telling me I am dead to him until I make this up to him.”

OP notes that the third call came just a few minutes after the second, not even leaving her time to write to her brother’s new wife. He has since blocked her.

Is OP’s family on her side?

OP’s husband and her mother are “bewildered by this.” Her dad, however, is not so flabbergasted.

“My father said I should have had more foresight, seeing as I am a woman and wore white to a wedding.”

Is OP in the wrong? Here’s what the internet had to say:

OP’s treatment at the wedding is appalling

“I, too, am bewildered. It sounds like your outfit was predominantly dark in color and obviously was not a wedding dress or bridal garb in any way. The behavior of those who were offended at the wedding is atrocious and disgusting.

“EVEN IF you had indeed made the faux pas they seem to think you did, that would have been ridiculous and inappropriate treatment. I’m sorry you were held to that ridiculous standard.

“Does your family dynamic historically really involve statements like ‘You’re dead to me?’ What does your brother even mean by ‘making it up to him?’ They honestly just sound extraordinarily easily triggered, unkind, and mean.”

Did the men at the wedding also have to apologize?

“If you’d worn a white suit, then I’d be thinking that’s in the realm of what a bride could wear, but a black suit with a white shirt—did every man get told to apologize as well?

“They need to get a grip on reality.”

Taking your suit jacket off is normal at a wedding

“There’s no way every person in a black suit there kept their jacket on the whole night besides OP.”

OP probably looked like the waitstaff, not the bride

“After a few drinks, I might have mistaken you for staff (black suit, white shirt) and asked you for more wine.

“You weren’t decked out in a white dress.”

This is probably about gender stereotypes, not OP’s white blouse

“I think they were likely being (bad people) because you were transgressing some boring gender boundaries around formal wear and wearing trousers.

“That, and this also smacks of SIL and her friends being the sort of people who like to create drama. They found something they could make a fuss about and give them an excuse to (torment) you under the banner of some other, more ‘socially acceptable’ excuse about wearing white.”

Is this really about the bride, or is it about the groom?

“This is a reach here because I don’t really know your relationship with them, but it is based on how you were dressed similarly to a lot of the men.

“Could they have gotten themselves (upset) because one of them came up with the idea that you tried to bring attention to yourself by looking like the groom?”

Has anything else happened since the wedding?

OP posted a brief update on her original situation. Since bringing her story to the internet, her brother has reached out again.

“I just got an email from my brother, telling me that if I want to redeem myself, I could reimburse his wife the cost of the dress,” said OP.

This article was written and syndicated by What the Fab.

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