There’s no shortage of rude restaurant behavior, whether it be chewing with your mouth open, or leaving a poor tip. In this case, one woman’s loud phone disrupted an otherwise quiet restaurant.
Her fellow diner asked the internet if they had a right to ask her to silence her phone. Let’s dig in:
Backstory
The original poster (OP) was dining at a restaurant. The restaurant was not loud or busy. Instead, it was a calm and quiet cafe.
What happened?
Seated next to OP was a woman with her phone out on the table. Every two to three minutes, her phone would make an “incredibly loud, high-pitched ring” when she got a notification, according to OP.
The woman seemed to not care about the notification at all, not even looking at her phone when it made a noise.
Is OP wrong for asking her to silence it so they can enjoy their meal in peace? Here’s how the internet responded:
It’s a private establishment, ask the server
“It’s private property. You can ask cafe staff to intervene if the woman is disturbing other customers. Then the staff gets to decide which side they support.”
Never ask the server to intervene
“Speaking as a server, unless you are in actual physical danger, please don’t ask us to solve your personal problems with another customer. That’s not what we’re paid to do, it’s not within our normal job responsibilities, and it puts us in an incredibly awkward position where, no matter what we do, we are probably going to get in trouble with our boss.”
Public spaces have limits
“What’s the limit? Can she play the trombone there because it’s a public space? If you’re in a public space and you’re being disruptive then you need some manners. Constant ping, ping, ping is disruptive.
OP can ask, but she doesn’t have to comply
“For all we know the other customer might have some sort of hearing problem and keeps the notifications loud for a reason. But even if she doesn’t, there is no requirement that she turn it down.”
The woman’s behavior went beyond typical noise levels
“I absolutely agree that you don’t have a right to ‘peace and quiet’ at a cafe but there’s a difference between reasonably expected cafe background noise and persistent high pitch sounds. The point of public places is that we’re all trying to enjoy the space. Not one person enjoying it however they want at the detriment of everyone else.”
OP should just move tables
“Just move to another table if it’s so annoying for you. For all you know, she has an issue with her hearing.”
What would you do if someone nearby was spilling all over you?
This woman was simply being loud, but what if she had been even more disruptive? One man faced a difficult situation when a child constantly spilled glitter all over him on a flight, only for her mom to lash out at him.
Here’s how the story unfolded.
Is being disruptive ever okay?
In this story, the only noise was just a few phone notifications. What if it was something louder?
A daughter was accused of ruining the family vacation when she yelled at her parents to get a divorce in the middle of a busy airport.
Is this the one time that talking back to your parents is justified? Decide here.
This woman was taking away from OP’s “me time,” like this girlfriend
What happens when your significant other is offended by your “me time?” That was the case for one man when his girlfriend woke up in tears because he got up early for some much-needed time alone.
Whose side are you on? This is how it played out.
Elise Armitage is an entrepreneur and founder of What The Fab, a travel + lifestyle blog based in California. At the beginning of 2019, Elise left her corporate job at Google to chase her dreams: being an entrepreneur and helping women find fabulous in the everyday. Since then, she’s launched her SEO course Six-Figure SEO, where she teaches bloggers how to create a passive revenue stream from their website using SEO. Featured in publications like Forbes, Elle, HerMoney, and Real Simple, Elise is a firm believer that you can be of both substance and style.
