Stepmom Bans Her Sick Stepson From the House. His Dad Doesn’t Feel Like It’s Justified, but There’s a Catch

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Co-parenting can be tricky, especially in blended families. In this case, however, one stepmom found the bright side of it.

When her stepson got sick, the woman wanted to send him away to stay with his biological mother, using her husband’s first marriage to her advantage. After all, why keep a sick child around his chronically ill stepsibling?

The stepson’s mother didn’t exactly see it that way, accusing the woman of favoring her biological child over her stepson. The woman’s husband eventually caved, siding with his ex to keep the peace.

She took to the internet to figure out if she was wrong for trying to get her stepson out of the house.

This is how the story played out:

Backstory

The stepmother in question, or the original poster (OP), is married to Matt. The couple has been together for four years and got married about a year ago.

Both OP and Matt have a child from their previous relationships. OP’s daughter, Abby, is 10 years old. OP has full custody of her because her father passed away before she was born. Matt’s son, Dylan, is eight years old and is only with the couple 50% of the time, as Matt and his ex-partner have split custody of him.

Abby has special health concerns

Unfortunately, OP’s daughter, Abby, has fragile health. She was born with a chronic illness that makes her immune system incredibly weak. Her condition is so bad that she needs to be homeschooled to avoid germs.

“I know things happen and people get sick, but when Abby gets sick, she always ends up being hospitalized because of it,” OP explains.

Does OP get along with her stepson?

It sounds like OP’s blended family typically lives in harmony with each other. “I love Dylan like he’s my own and consider him as my son. He’s a sweet little boy,” says OP.

What happened?

When Dylan was staying with his mom, he got sick with the stomach flu. Dylan’s mom called Matt, OP’s husband, to let him know that Dylan wasn’t feeling well.

When Dylan was at OP and Matt’s house two days prior, Dylan seemed healthy and was just fine.

How did OP react to Dylan’s illness?

OP immediately got concerned about Dylan being around Abby while he was sick, as she didn’t want Abby to end up in the hospital again.

She got on the phone with Dylan’s mom and asked if it was possible for him to stay at her house until he recovered to avoid getting Abby sick.

Did Dylan’s mom agree?

Dylan’s mother is aware of Abby’s condition. Still, she insisted that it would be fine to have Dylan back in OP’s house. She told OP that Dylan and Abby could just be quarantined to their rooms until Dylan recovers.

How did OP respond?

OP didn’t think that forcing Dylan and Abby to stay in their rooms until Dylan recovers would be fair to either child. OP also pointed out that she would be around both children, meaning that she could possibly contaminate Abby.

What does OP’s husband think?

Matt tried talking to his ex about the situation on OP’s behalf. The conversation didn’t go well.

Dylan’s mom accused the couple of favoring Abby over Dylan, which OP says “isn’t true. Abby just has more needs health-wise.” She called OP a vulgar name, at which point Matt gave in and told OP that they should just have Dylan come back to their house.

Is OP wrong for keeping Dylan out of the house? Here’s what the internet thinks:

OP and Abby should stay elsewhere

“Take your daughter and go to a motel. Your stepson can stay with his dad, and you will come home after he pays to have the house deep cleaned.

“All you need is to have your daughter hospitalized –again! because your husband’s ex doesn’t want to help you out,” wrote one person.

Another chimed in, correcting the original comment, saying, “Not a motel.

“A HOTEL. With spa treatments, tea time, and Mommy and Me mani/pedis. Lots of movies to rent. And room service.

“Husband will then remember to say “No” next time.”

OP and her husband need to figure out a long-term solution

“A long-term solution does need to be made here. Is Dylan expected to stay at his mom’s house every time he gets sick? Kids get sick a lot. What would they be doing if Dylan was OP’s bio son and didn’t have another parent to stay with every time he got sick? Are they going to a hotel every time this happens?

“All three parents need to sit down and come up with a solution…I am not suggesting that a solution will be easy, and maybe this works in the short term, but a talk should be had about how to handle this when it comes up again.”

Nobody is wrong here

“Your ask isn’t unreasonable, but neither is her refusal. You made the choice to bring your daughter into a blended family with another child. You can’t have the child’s mother as your only alternate plan, that’s not fair to her. The child’s mother has a life built around co-parenting.

“Speaking as a mother whose ex constantly had excuses to not take the kids, it’s frustrating. I realize that your situation is different, but remember that she has a life with plans and commitments that are built around the co-parenting plan. Both parents should have flexibility, but there may be times when that flexibility is impossible or highly inconvenient.”

OP needs to consider compensating Dylan’s mother for the inconvenience

“I understand why you want your daughter to be safe. However, when you married your husband, you knew he had a kid. He is responsible for his child during his time, sick or not.

“Instead of asking the mom to take care of her sick son so more days off of work. Are you willing to pay for her time taken off to help you? You guys should have a plan where you and your daughter leave. Stay with family or a hotel. She [is homeschooled], so hopefully [it] isn’t too difficult to pack what she needs.”

Dylan’s mom shouldn’t have to care for a sick child every time

“It wouldn’t be fair for Dylan’s mom to have to take care of him on her own every time he gets sick. It doesn’t sound like she ever agreed to that.

“I’m surprised that this issue wasn’t worked about before OP and her husband got married.”

This article was written and syndicated by What the Fab.

Should teenagers get away with stealing?

It sounds like OP and Dylan get along well, but that isn’t the case for every stepmother and her stepchildren.

Tormented by her stepdaughters, who stole from the house and bullied her children, one woman didn’t know what to do.

She banned them from the house, and the internet is torn.

Do stepparents get to parent their stepchildren?

OP and Matt’s ex might clash again over this situation.

When a stepchild was caught bullying her stepsister, her stepfather didn’t take it well. He furiously kicked her out of the house, sending her to live with her father.

Instead of taking her husband’s side, the stepchild’s biological mother was enraged. She insisted that the stepfather had no right to parent her daughter.

Did he make the right call? People are split.

Do stepchildren have to split inheritances?

Matt and OP should come up with a plan for Abby and Dylan’s inheritance now to avoid them being caught in drama like this later.

One sibling duo was at odds when one sibling, the biological child, received their dad’s entire inheritance because of a technicality. Her brother insisted she share the wealth, but she refused.

Were her reasons understandable? Decide for yourself.